Somewhere along the line, you may have been taught that softness is a weakness. Maybe some event or something that happened to you, made you feel that to survive you needed to 'get tough and be strong.' To be soft felt vulnerable and that can feel scary.
Well, I'm here to ask,
Do you think you could invite more softness to your life?
I love the word invitation. An invitation means you are attempting to bring something in. You're being curious about something. It doesn't mean you have to do it and it's not a demand or something that you must do. An invitation is soft in itself. So I invite you now, to be curious as to whether you could bring more softness into your life.
Often we're told it's such a positive and wonderful thing to be strong. How do you visualise being strong? We may have this image of a warrior like figure, possibly male, but even if it's female, we may think of this warrior or goddess type woman.
What do you think of when you think of the word 'soft?'
Do you equate soft with the more feminine traits such as gentleness? Do we see gentle as slightly more negative? Do we see gentle and soft possibly as weaker? Do we visualise a more timid version of a person?
Just be curious about your preconceptions of these traits.
When we find ourselves in a place where we're looking to find positive words to give us a boost we look for things that give us strength. Words such as, strength, force, might or power may come to mind. Sometimes, this may feel unachievable or feel too harsh.
We could start looking at these softer traits as strengths. Isn't it a strength to show your gentler, softer side sometimes? So maybe we could see words like soft, gentle and kind as true strengths and powerful words.
Don't be mistaken that softness means weak
Being soft means you're welcoming compassion and understanding into your life.
Being soft means you're open to change and able to adapt. Softness is less rigid.
Just look at nature, something as soft as water has immense power.
I've talked before about bringing a Sankalpa into your life. This a word that you can carry with you, much like a gentle reminder phrase or something to carry along with you, through your year.
This year my Sankalpa is 'softness'.
This is how it works:
When I feel myself tensing my jaw and raising my shoulders, bringing tension into my body, I think 'soften.'
In times of conflict or irritation I will think 'soften.' We can always be more compassionate and soft, towards ourselves and others.
When I feel the tension of being busy and and constantly being 'on' I think 'soften.'
'Soft' may just allow you to drop your shoulders a little, unclench that jaw a little bit more and bring in a little softness to your thoughts and your feelings.
We all need a little more soft and gentle in this world and a little less striving and pushing.
Obviously life is a balance. But if you feel yourself with too much, go go go and feeling the pressure and the tension of being in that place. Maybe you could try a little more softness.
It can be helpful to think of a hero, heroine, guru, god, goddess, real or imagined to embody and help you bring an element into your life. This way, whenever you think of bringing that element in, in this case softness, you can imagine this character. *
I invite you right now to take a deep breath and deeply and completely let that breath go...
Soften your jaw, loosen your facial expression, and drop your shoulders.
Right now, just for this moment, you can let go.
With each long slow exhale think to yourself, 'soften'
Start to see softness for the strength it really is and have a think, how could you invite a little more softness into your life?
Go gently,
Karen. 🌿
*Want to know my inspiration for someone showing softness as a strength?
Audrey Hepburn. What a beautiful strong, yet soft woman standing in her power.
Drop me a note in the comments and share yours.